Have you ever thought about dating a divorced man? Does the thought of meeting his ex-wife have you feeling scared? Well, don’t worry. Today, our Colts Neck matchmaking experts here at New Jersey Singles Dating Service will teach you everything you need to know about dating a divorced man.
In today’s New Jersey dating scene, it’s not unusual to find yourself dating a divorced man. With one out of three marriages failing, it’s no wonder there are so many divorced men out there, and this leaves plenty of wonderful eligible men back on the market. Of course these men come with a past, but then again, who doesn’t have a past?
One of the biggest stigmas about dating a divorced man is that they make lousy spouses, which is not always the case. Of course everyone is different, but that’s up to you to find out. Just because a man has been married before doesn’t mean he’s going to make for a lousy spouse in the future, and just because his relationship didn’t work out before does not mean it won’t work out with you. Still, dating a man or a woman who has been married before requires patience and different dating techniques… And of course they do come with a little more baggage. But if you’ve been divorced yourself, then you, better than anyone, should know that doesn’t make you a lousy partner.
Today, our Colts Neck matchmaking experts here at New Jersey Singles Dating Service will teach you everything you need to know about the right way to date a divorced man.
1. Forget He’s Divorced
Don’t let the fact that he has previously been married affect you whatsoever. When visions of him being a lousy spouse come through your head, just remember that divorces are not that much different from a breakup. Divorce is just an expensive term.
Don’t imagine his ex-wife being a nagging and annoying person either. Remember, at the end of the day there are three sides to every story, his, hers, and the truth. Don’t judge their relationship either. It isn’t yours and it has nothing to do with you. Would it be okay if he were to judge you based on your exes and all the choices you have made in the past? Doesn’t seem fair, right?
2. Accept That He Comes with Baggage
Divorced men are in a completely different category than men who have never been married. These men are often more mature and less inclined to play those infamous dating games, which is a great reason or you to date him. However, as the title indicates, they do come with a little extra baggage. Divorced men have been through a lot; they are not like the frat boys you used to date. They are not likely to get committed again too quickly, so go easy on him.
3. Start the Relationship at the Right Pace
Speaking of taking it easy on this man, you also want to take it easy as you approach a relationship with him. If you are dating a divorced man, chances are, he has already been around the block. And because he’s had a little more experience with relationships, which means he has probably had his heart stomped and he’ll probably less likely to rush the next relationship. So if you are looking for a man to put a ring on your finger after only two months of dating, look elsewhere. Divorced men would rather take things slow, and for a very good reason.
4. Don’t Talk Less about His Ex
Maybe you had the chance to meet his ex, maybe you thought the day you met her you would exchange dirty looks with each other. Did she behave the way you expected her to? Was her living image more terrifying than the image you created in your head? Did she make you want to throw something at her? Trust us, you are probably not alone. There are many women out there who find the ex-wife to be less than friendly, but regardless of how you feel for this woman, don’t let it get to you and ruin what you have going with this man. Now, we’re not saying you need to go out for morning coffee together, just don’t talk badly about her. You want to come off as the bigger person, especially if you want a serious relationship with this man.
5. If He Has Children, Don’t Meet Them Too Soon
The best piece of advice our Colts Neck matchmaking experts can give you is if he has children, do not meet them too soon. Even if this man clearly wants to be with you, the children might not be ready. Also, if you and the children do get along well and the relationship doesn’t work out, you’re going to end up hurting the children. Give the relationship a few months to develop into something serious, then you can meet the children.
6. His Schedule Is Constantly Changing
One of the things you must understand about dating a divorced man or woman is that their schedule can change at the blink of an eye. You could be in the middle of a fancy restaurant about to order your dessert when all of the sudden he gets a call from his daughter’s ballet coach, letting him know she’s injured her foot and needs taken to the hospital. This means he’s immediately going to have to leave. Whatever the reason, you need to know that divorced men can have sudden schedule changes and this is something you need to be prepared for if you plan on dating one. If you do experience a sudden change of plans while you’re out, do not lose your patience or blow up on him. These are circumstances that are out of his control and if you want a serious relationship with him, then you need to be patient and understanding.
These 6 helpful tips from our Colts Neck matchmaking experts on dating a divorced man will help you navigate the first few months and will also help you handle his ex-wife and help you know when it’s proper to meet his children. Dating a divorced man doesn’t have to be complicated, as long as you follow our expert advice.
If you’re struggling to meet quality men on your own, contact our matchmakers here at New Jersey Singles Dating Service and let us set you up with successful men who are also serious about dating and falling in love.